ps i may or may not be wearing a sequined bra
holy crap !! There is a MIDGET FAMILY in one of my rooms today !
How much trouble would you get into if you were to stomp down the hallway while loudly saying 'Fe Fi Fo Fum...'
I spent my night drunkenly staring at a picture of John Stamos. How do you think I feel?
The last thing i remember was high fiving everyone on the planet.
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He was streaking. We were hammered. We had roman candles. It only made sense to shoot them at him.
all i remember is him tryin to explain to the girls how to effectively hit the strip club with their bfs
hes actually pretty persuasive when he drinks
why is there a broken handcuff locked to the ceiling fan
The gas station was closed so we found old PBR and played Edward Nalgene Hands instead
Well I'm missing half a toenail if that's any indication of my night
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Are you ok?
They gave me a cat until I fall asleep. His name is fluffy because he's fluffy.
Being home for break is weird, just had a full convo with my dad about what I wanted for dinner, while a dildo was on top of me under my comforter
I'm drinking apple juice and champagne while watching crossroads..like the classy bitch that i am.
This couple is walking their pig around campus
I don't get a "my roommate is fucking you" discount?!
She made me watch three musicals and then told me she was too tired for me to stay over. I think I'm being punished but I have no clue what I did.
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