smell like capt'n and strawberry champagne
People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh
maybe you did when you were drunk
no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.
So I went out tonight...met a guy who slightly resembled my dad,huge creeper, he asked me to "hang out" so I gave him my moms number since he was more her type:)
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
We need to start having rules for the weekends. Like no more downing 3 shots because we want to slut dance a little harder or because biggie just came on.
I didn't think her British accent was real until I saw how fucked up her teeth were.
Sarah Palin is going to have a show on the discovery channel...Can I get a moment of silence for knowledge?
my wrists were so small for the handcuffs, i could slip them off and hand the tow truck driver my keys....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Once he past out I measured his penis with my remote.
Trying to grind with crutches was not a success
Either I just got hit on by a 10 year old.girl dressed like a boy or I just got hit on by a midget lesbian. Either way I feel uncomfortable
Maybe before the beach I should get a tracking chip in my arm.
You are driving me to get new toys, i am test driving them on the way home.
We are taking your truck.
I woke up with a pillow, shampoo and a plant in my fridge. Eggs in the toilet, and I was wearing three pairs of girls underwear. What happened last night
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