covered in glitter, my cheek hurts, and theres a handprint on my face. Would i do it again. Absolutly
Well ya in hindsight obviously offering the cop a jello shot was a bad idea
i seriously have like 9 pictures of people taking shots out of a vag on my camera....
No i peed with you in the toilet. The guy I high fived was mid pee in front of the urinal
Don't smoke out front when you get home there's gasoline involved I'll tell you later
Nurse helped me count all my sexual partners and still gave me her phone number. She shall be #73.
Being at this stripclub only reinforces how single I am. And I was *just* becoming okay with that.
It's like, "you literally have no idea who i am but i definitely slept with your brother in your bed."
Clearly it doesn't get better with age. Just more sexual
They ran out of toilet paper, so I had a girl rip down the streamers so I could wipe.
Uhh I just had to break up with a guy who I didn't even know I was dating...
I need to start journaling my drunk thoughts. Drunk me is fucking brilliant & sober me is missing out.
I am no longer embarassed by my vagina
It concerns why you would be in the first place, but I'd rather not know
I hear my roommate snoring and I feel bad for his girlfriend but then I hear them having sex and I guess it all works out in the end.
Come cuddle! I'll be passed out somewhere in the library. It'll be like a scavenger hunt!
Randomize
