he thinks he's going to hurt your feelings
He can't hurt my feelings
I don't have feelings.
In a few years, 50 babies 50 states. Like it?
My only options right now are Herpes, Gay, or Vanilla.
He asked the clerk if they sell a penis-shaped brander.
My autobiography is now tentatively titled "I'm Fucking the DJ, and Other Ways to Party for Cheap"
he just used "boss" and "boner" in the same sentence. I cant respond.
PROFESSOR JUST TOOK A SHOT WITH US BEFORE CLASS. WELCOME TO THE LAST DAY OF FINALS.
Just got smoked out by my boss. Working in politics is great.
Is biking from my house to 6th street for liquor pitchers a good idea or a bad idea
He told me the hickey on the side if his neck was actually a "bruise" from hitting a bird on his motorcycle. I'm not sure what's more impressive, the fact people believed him due to the size of the mark or the fact you gave it to him.
HOW DID ALL OF US MISS THE OBVIOUS: I'LL SHAKE YOUR SPEARE
Just burnt my tongue. Not sure if it will help or hurt giving blow jobs
Leave it to you to bring a trash can into a fist fight.
I think one make out session at a bar per year is probably the best choice.
We could just stay sober.
No! We tried that once.
It sucked.
Randomize
