If you borrow your friends real doll, should you wear a condom?
what kind of vibe do I give off that a guy i've never hung out with thinks its okay to send me a picture of his ball cleavage?
I can only name 15 people I've had sex with - can I just start claiming that as my sex number?
If you don't sleep with him after showing him your thong with the bow, I am no longer on your side.
my advisor is telling us the best way to sneak in alcohol on move in day. I definately picked the right college
I fingered her though her window because she couldn't leave
There was a reason God said "Let there be titties" on the Fifth Day.
Want to go home, so casually slip my underwear in his pocket. Never seen him grin so big and say goodbye to his friends.
I may have just made our entire microwave glow green. Like big green. Like spark and make me shit green.
Like worse than the time I blew up the microwave with the egg green.
MIDGETS
????
Alex I've come up with a new medical condition. dick depression. it's a real thing and I have it
Did I wash my face last night at your house? Where did my eyebrows go??
When did we go from stumbling drunk into an ER at 3am to dinner double dating?
Here's the thing. Kinda drunk. Eating leftover soup. In bed. Watching Disney channel.
Could be all of this cough syrup, but I’m ready to fuck 2018 up!
Randomize
