I'm drinking whiskey outta the bottle trying to earn the trust of some ducks in the yard
And on top of all this... he just told me to "chill my nips."
I found her in the bathroom licking her screwdriver off the floor. she said there was no way she was wasting a $6 drink.
well what is some mechanical horse racing with out blow involved
You called me 32 times last night just to tell me you felt a heartbeat in your vagina?
I got stoned in my snow covered car and pretended I was burried alive
So how much of last night are we going to pretend never happened? Enough to stay friends?
I just debated creating a mirror system so I could play Batman while in the bathroom. I think I need help.
I already knew that. But I also don't agree with stifling creativity.
Topenga is going to be back on TV. Finally my fantasy of her being a milf in junior high has come full circle.
Neat. I'm thinking about growing a handlebar muffstache. What are your thoughts on this?
Either you got hacked or we need to have a serious discussion about sending penis enlargement emails to your straight friends and why you shouldn't. It sends the wrong message.
Is it too early in the day to ask a nipple-related question?
I'm going to reward myself for having sex with coffee and a breakfast burrito.
i woke up in just my thong, face first on my bed with all the lights on. how hungover do you think i felt?
I smell like a mix of alcohol, sweat, and sex and its only 10 AM
Randomize
