Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(720): View more from Colorado

Where are you?

(720): View more from Colorado

In a non slutty way

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(720): Where are you? (720): In a non slutty way http://tfl.nu/w6fm

Replies (3) Good night (1259) Bad night (587)
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(904): View more from Florida

Remember when I use to call my dick 'the pendulum'

(1-904): View more from Florida

wtf?

(904): View more from Florida

It is now the artist formerly known as 'insideyourgirlfriend'

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(904): Remember when I use to call my dick 'the pendulum' (1-904): wtf? (904): It is now the artist formerly known as 'insideyourgirlfriend' http://tfl.nu/kgyk

Replies (14) Good night (4540) Bad night (972)
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(985): View more from Louisiana

Don't you think facebook is a bit pretentious, suggesting friends and all? No facebook, I would NOT like to be friends with a girl whose fiancee I have slept with.

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(985): Don't you think facebook is a bit pretentious, suggesting friends and all? No facebook, I would NOT like to be friends with a girl whose fiancee I have slept with. http://tfl.nu/8rek

Replies (43) Good night (4954) Bad night (1003)
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(931): View more from Tennessee

I considered driving home in his mom's bathrobe until i realized i'd have to stop to buy cigarettes

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(931): I considered driving home in his mom's bathrobe until i realized i'd have to stop to buy cigarettes http://tfl.nu/c6hz

Replies (17) Good night (1068) Bad night (2092)
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(715): View more from Wisconsin

I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.

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(715): I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too. http://tfl.nu/0d25

Replies (38) Good night (1232) Bad night (4350)
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(480): View more from Arizona

You're pretty and everything..but you aren't worth the DUI

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(480): You're pretty and everything..but you aren't worth the DUI http://tfl.nu/lcvv

Replies (24) Good night (6927) Bad night (2141)
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(973): View more from New Jersey

can't remember last night but the beers were $3.50, so i can count how many I had by counting my quarters

(973): View more from New Jersey

i can afford to take several trips up and down the parkway right now if I wasn't still hanging over my toilet

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(973): can't remember last night but the beers were $3.50, so i can count how many I had by counting my quarters (973): i can afford to take several trips up and down the parkway right now if I wasn't still hanging over my toilet http://tfl.nu/povn

Replies (11) Good night (2528) Bad night (1026)
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(940): View more from Texas

Hey I think I found part of your tooth next to your wine bottle in the floor board of my car.

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(940): Hey I think I found part of your tooth next to your wine bottle in the floor board of my car. http://tfl.nu/1zvq

Replies (8) Good night (911) Bad night (2588)
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(847): View more from Illinois

That girl that gave me a blowjob, I think I fired her last year.

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(847): That girl that gave me a blowjob, I think I fired her last year. http://tfl.nu/exle

Replies (16) Good night (3267) Bad night (1282)
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(703): View more from Virginia

You need to stop blackout tweeting at him to have sex with you on the roof of your dorm. He doesn't even have a twitter.

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(703): You need to stop blackout tweeting at him to have sex with you on the roof of your dorm. He doesn't even have a twitter. http://tfl.nu/b2tf

Replies (4) Good night (2737) Bad night (925)
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(918): View more from Oklahoma

Went to the wedding reception, and he left with ALL of the brides maids phone numbers. I don't know how he does it either.

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(918): Went to the wedding reception, and he left with ALL of the brides maids phone numbers. I don't know how he does it either. http://tfl.nu/yx3m

Replies (12) Good night (2486) Bad night (641)
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(870): View more from Arkansas

If anyone could figure out how to pee on someone's soul, it would be you.

(1-870): View more from Arkansas

You always know what to say to make me feel better.

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(870): If anyone could figure out how to pee on someone's soul, it would be you. (1-870): You always know what to say to make me feel better. http://tfl.nu/or61

Replies (2) Good night (1851) Bad night (698)
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(808): View more from Hawaii

They have a booking log online so i can just check that instead of call

(906): View more from Michigan

Technology: making bailing your sister out easier since 2008

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(808): They have a booking log online so i can just check that instead of call (906): Technology: making bailing your sister out easier since 2008 http://tfl.nu/rt6t

Replies (1) Good night (1513) Bad night (654)
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(201): View more from New Jersey

Like "oh its Monday, gotta get wasted today!" not "oh its Monday.. Gotta go to class"

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(201): Like "oh its Monday, gotta get wasted today!" not "oh its Monday.. Gotta go to class" http://tfl.nu/e4eb

Replies (2) Good night (856) Bad night (541)
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(212): View more from New York

Oh man, are we repeating last 4th of July?!

(1-212): View more from New York

That shouldn't even be a question, it's a tradition now. Hope your manhood is ready.

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(212): Oh man, are we repeating last 4th of July?! (1-212): That shouldn't even be a question, it's a tradition now. Hope your manhood is ready. http://tfl.nu/5w6l

Replies (0) Good night (626) Bad night (288)

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