you really need to stop walk of shaming home from theme parties.
Ikea night.
?
Insert tab A into swedish slot B
I cant help but queef when the male extremity enters
What is a male extremity?
i didnt realize it was that long since you've had sex
i convinced her that her period would come back if we did it doggy style
Does puking on your bio final mean I can retake it?
the laptop wouldn't balance on his lap. that's how well endowed he is.
He just kept screaming "I have democratic immunity" as the cops dragged him into the car.
Does hooking up with the gay pledge count as hazing?
Listen to my proposal.... I feed you crackers while I fuck you ever so gently.
whoa! who said he's my boyfriend?
Oops. Sorry. That guy you keep accidentally running into in public. And at home. And with your vagina.
The guy at the ER said it was the first time he's given stitches for a funneling accident. Then he seemed upset that I took pride in that...
I was loaded. my pee still has a hint of lime
I mean I'm screaming I love the gays in the middle of Bart so yeah
It's whatever. Titanic is about to be on and we have wine, which is basically crying juice. Leo, Kate, and I will be having a lovely, pants free evening.
She made me a smoothie in the morning.. It was vodka and fruit.
Randomize
