thus making me awesome and them whores
I thought she was going to get passionate and throw her on the bed and fuck her, but she just started breaking stuff.
That's the thing about women.
finally achieved: got laid in the religion section of borders. thought you should know.
I feel like royalty, that girl from last night had a vajazzled vag. Bucket list complete.
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
and now there are teeth marks on my dick.
She wasn't to happy when she went to put her shirt on and it was covered in cum I just looked at her and said collateral damage....
Guess what happened to me today at work?
I have chlamydia. What happened.
Oh lets talk about your news first. Mine is happy so it should go second.
then you said,"Take this damn cabbage!" although it was actually your shirt. i found you in the elevator of his building.
Just had a threesome with a hot Turkish guy and an even hotter French lawyer. This what happens when I travel alone. You have only yourself to blame for this.
I just remembered that last night I seriously contemplated swallowing the cap to my toothpaste
Nothing $200 worth of strippers and spicy fried chicken couldn't fix.
It's a good thing vaginas don't have taste buds
You came in last night, ate an entire avocado in silence, and then told me I should never accept rides from strangers. Not sure I even want to know what happened to you last night!
My bed smells like the plague
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