U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
Woo Hoo! Just saw Asian kids with rocker mullets. Tried to get a picture on my phone, but you know how those ninjas are.
She kept saying "I didn't do it" but she was so drunk she forgot her pee was orange from her UTI medicine.
they just did a mariachi cover of free bird
low key just jizzed in a chinese food container
His dick might not be the answer to my problems, but I'm definitely ok with testing it as a possible solution.
She just stuck her hand down the strippers pants. Shit just got real.
The last thing I remember was riding in a grocery cart with two strangers while a cop pushed us
For our 1st date, he tried to schedule a rock climbing. I suggested, "how about we meet at my place and you can scale Mt. Vagina?"
It's like an adderall Houdini. Right when you think you have a deal he disappears
you can tell a lot about a person by the quality of their porn
I refuse to plan drunken casual sex. Just think of the monster I'd create.
Hey. You dropped and smashed your road beer in my store last night. Again. And this time you didn't even order anything. You just walked in, yelled "SWEDISH STYLE!" Then lost your beer, looked depressed, and left.
Just remembered sticking my head out the window as i drove us to walmart and yelling that i was a golden retriever.
Also, sorry for verbally assaulting you when you asked if you could dump the bowl.
Sexual side note: sushi and cum do not mix well. That is all.
Randomize
