He came through my line today and bought designer impostor perfume, just for men gel, and astroglide. I almost DIED.
I am currently eating pure cake frosting...I am not sure how I was ever referred to as a responsible adult.
Brutal- a couple weeks back I had a 28 hr blackout and four day hangover. S'why I decided to haul it in
At least I know she didn't hear me crawl to my room. Or did I walk on my hands? Fuck if I know.
at some point i feel off my bar stool straight into the arms of a gay guy. just my luck.
So yeah you need to stop having near death experiences at McDonalds.
Hung over does not do it justice. I am hung like a horse over. I am hungover and over and over. I am hung, drawn and quartered fucking over. They just told me I can't keep my sunglasses on in the office. Fuck drinking with you people.
I was in the freezer we were knocking over shit. Speaking of which i asked my boss. I can hook up with girls in the freezer
Yeah just sayin. Whenever you want to come over and wank me off you can
I want to hump her dimples until her face caves in.
So many issues. You honestly need help.
I blame it on the rum. It keeps jumpng doqn my throst.
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
I've now spilled wine and got poptarts all over my cast. So much for my doc taking me seriously...
I woke up with masking tape on my nipples this morning........... WHY DO BAD THINGS HAPPEN TO GOOD PEOPLE
Left Las Vegas at 2:30 am, woke up at 11 AM at a Barstow gas station with the Valet from Ceaser' palace snoring in the backseat and no memory of how we got there. I felt like Raoul Fucjing Duke right then and there.
I told him to not try to hang out with me ever again and now I regret it Bc im bleeding through my uterus and just want him to suck on my aching nipples
Randomize
