we used that portable toilet as a cooler to keep coronas. next person who tells me hospitals arn't fun needs to come party in rm 180.
i just checked to make sure valentines day this year was on a weekend assuming ill want to be drunk all day
hearing about your life makes me feel so good about mine
Yes i believe i did use that word. It culminated in a man wearing a corset thigh highs and stripper shoes. All mine btw.
I kept grabbing at Stephanie's boobs because I thought the leopard spots on her dress were popcorn.
well what she called a "work function" most people call "doing shots with your boss while people throw napkins at you."
Best part of failing a semester of college: not having to buy books next semester. I can drink to that
We had sex in the morning in pregnant lady position. Like fuck me like the hott piece of ass that I am, not your wife of 7 years.
It's because of weed that I don't mind driving an hour to visit my family. And it's because of you that there's weed in my life. Thank you.
alll i remember is comming back downstairs, his pants were off and he was aplauding me
Also, totally got laid in my yellow rubber boots and it was awesome.
he keeps various drugs in his kitchen cupboard like groceries. that is my new life goal as an adult.
I should be trashily making out with an air force cadet in the beach volleyball court by now
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
She demanded to see my stimulus package, I had to go over.
the weird part wasn't waking up in someone else's underwear, it was how the cat was staring at me like he knew more about last night then i remembered.
Randomize