I was up until 12:30 making that damned grammar test for my freshmen then I caught myself running through the verb tenses when I was giving him head.
"I have sucked, I will suck, I will have suck, I am sucking..." I've never felt more like a nerdier slut than last night.
how do i word it so it doesnt sound like im asking him if he has ever been in jail.
oh good. ive just found out that i went downstairs at 6 am still blacked out and had a 30 minute conversation with my mom about the different ways to feed our dog
I finally won that bet on when the anorexic girl would pass out at the gym. You owe me 10 now
my co-worker, his best friend who also works with us, an my baby daddy, ive turned love triangle into a retarded shape with to many sides to pronounce
And my cat won't make me food. She's a bitch
is year to celebrate how much I love you, I made a mosaic of your penis with conversation hearts. it's in your mailbox.\n\nHAPPY VALENTINE'S DAY TO YOU
Do not deep throat a rocket pop, it WILL go into your lungs, and you may die.
We got back from the bar and started watching bizzare foods, which subsequently led to the consumption of large amounts of rancid lunch meat and small insects.
this st patricks day sucks
ill send jameson via bank tube 150+ miles
The pee I just pissed was about 7% better than the one at your house. But both are pretty far up there.
I have a hook up buddy in Abiquiu. He lives next to a Chipotle; that's the only reason I see him.
Just had my butthole waxed. If that changes your plans for Saturday..
Why let a Christmas Eve hangover ruin a perfectly good Christmas Day acid trip?
My penis definitely considers my Captain Cock costume a success
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