just heard the best thing ever: calling people's kids "fuck trophies"
I heard some girl say 'yeah he mustve been so drunk he kept mumbling and repeating himself'
And I thought
Fuck I do that shit every weekend
we were all standing in the kitchen taking shots and we look over at you and your face is in the plate of spaghetti you were eating.
She came over and gave me a handy and then just lingered for a day and a half. Worst weekend ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh come on. There's no way I was the only female choir student taking shots in the back room.
After blacking out and loosing my phone for a month, I found it in the parking lot across the street. Last text "rager in the street". I remember none of this.
I've never been to a "going away to jail" cookout. do we bring a present?
I taped a pair of scissors and a coupon for a waxing on the door. He gets to choose.
Dude you were sitting in front of me eating uncooked bow tie pasta...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hungover, threw up in a cosmetic case in my car this morning. This is real life.
It was a mess. I sat on the kitchen floor with maple whiskey and cried into a bowl of poutine. I've never even been to canada
Well yeah. But im not sure i trust the black out drunk high girl giving life advice
This is the difference between me and him; he buys you flowers, I buy you a dildo
If everyone felt the happiness from apple crown royal we would be in a better place
I just want this to serve as a reminder in the morning that the topic of conversation at last call was the penis size of jesus.
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