I'm youtube-ing children's choirs. Am I adorable? Or am I a child predator?
Predator. Straight up.
I could tell by the way he was holding my hand that he really liked you
In other news I saw a pack of make believe zombies walking down green st.
gotta love wednesdays
Manscaping on you would be like trying to clean up the oil spill with a dixie cup.
Like what kind of adult things? Whats more adult than drinking at 2pm on a monday?
come help me. im curled up in the fetal position on the upper floor of the lib. please bring more caffeine or alcohol
its ok. its hell week the lib is a no judgment zone right now
I really shouldn't have to tell you to stop banging your lightsaber on everything while we are in college.
I'm now having weird sexual fantasies about that riverdancing figure skater. So thanks for that.
I hate ovaries. They're horrible little sacs of satanic enmity.
That's the most poetic description of female anatomy I've ever heard.
He was super adorable, like I wanna pinch his cheeks while I fuck him...
PS there is a naked boy in my bed and I just left for the bar...
Look I'm really high right now, and if I were to leave this house, it would be for the sole purpose of getting an ice cream sandwich. So can you please just do it.
Ain't no cockblock like hearing the word"HOOODOOORR!" shouted from the bedroom floor while in the middle of sex.
It's a sad day when a deadly hurricane headed your way is less depressing than your relationship status.
If you dont get laid dressed as Woody Harrelson in Zombieland, I have lost all faith in the men of nw Indiana.
Randomize