and then he said that some chick told him he danced like an epileptic on crystal meth. he then proceeded to demonstrate this statement, which i can testify is 100% accurate.
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
If I had a nickel for every time my parents threatened to stop paying tuition I would be a very rich man. Rich enough to pay my own tuition.
we may have ended up at a gay bar on accident. we're gonna work this to get free drinks.
pretty sure if my vagina had a mouth, it would have been smiling afterwards.
Ong my arms are moving wo my consent
i think I'm just gonna buy a new vibrator, body pillow, some guys cologne to spray on it, a life time supply of wine and weed and be done with all this shit
It's one of those things you just need to see in person at least once in your life. Like Niagara falls or some shit. His ass is the Niagara falls of asses
Well I talked to some Canadians today, and I'm keeping a vigilant watch for sharks, so I'm pretty booked up.
At least your night didn't end with three cops seeing your ass and you sitting on the ground in a wig throwing your shoes at people
Who am I sleeping next to in your bed? Where are you? Also when are you coming home... I need coffee.
He's probably the biggest I've seen outside of the porn I vehemently deny watching and he asks if I think he's too small
Also this time, I didn't have a random creepy guy come up from behind me, grab my junk, and whisper "where's the cocaine?" in my ear. So that's also a win.
Yes. I had to slow down my handjob so he would last...-and I give shitty handjobs to begin with
I want to disappear from this job like a fart in the wind.💨
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