I heard we made out
Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
So i guess i slapped the girl sitting next to me leg and said "You know what they say, got fat legs...you gotta fat BOX"
I just banged that chick from the bar by speaking french. all i had to do was recite my grocery list
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Blood. All over. Pre coke adventure needs to slow down unless I'm involved
He said I did a backflip off the thing on the doorframe and busted my ass. I'd give anything to remember
Woke up in an unfamiliar pair of underwear, running shoes but no socks, and a cowboy hat. Thank you crown royal
Well were gunna have to wash the couch cover now...maybe even the couch, soap or fire your decision
Just missed the last train for another 5 hours. There are balls in or around the mouth of my life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think shooting the BMW with the bow and arrow is when our group became the evening's antagonist
think of it as grooming, as if he is my Kate Middleton and I'm grooming him to be a presentable princess
Fairly certain I cracked a rib. Masturbation is not for the weak. I die now.
Everyone should know the rule that if your dicks touch during a threeway you just make lightsaber noises and move on.
Just bought condoms with a walmart gift card. Thanks grandma.
We ran out of toilet paper so Ive been using coffee filters
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