Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
Dude it was awful. I woke up with more strippers in my dorm room than those duke lacrosse kids.
Are you trying to threaten my boobs?
The more I throw up, the more I am remembering exactly what I drank last night...in order.
so either half this theatre is as stoned as me, or day daybreakers is hilarious
I've come to realize time passes slowest when I'm sitting in class, waiting for microwavable foods, working out, & giving head.
I have decided today is drunk costume day. That is, i woke up still drunk and found costumes all over my floor. Heck yes. This is happening. Come over. Drink.
Woke up to a huge puddle of water in the living room floor, apparently I made an indoor snowman.
we are both sitting on my bed desperately refreshing the order tracking page for dominos.
The best way to start drinking is as early as possible. eg, this bar isn't open but we're patiently waiting outside. That way you're confident and exciting when the talent arrives. Or too drunk to care.
Had sex with him again...yikes. and the whole time he kept saying "i wish we could do this forever." Forever lasted about 45 seconds
I haven't been this unsober in a long time. I feel like I am observing myself. Like I am a test subject for alcohol. I wish my brain would shut up and let me be a normal drunk.
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
dude wtf why are there forks in my wall
does "I AM MAGNETOOOO" ring any bells, because that was you for an entire hour last night
His birthday is on cinco de mayo and he doesn’t drink or like tacos. What a waste.
Randomize
