okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
You were running around the house with a purple crayon asking people to call you harold..
Sometimes i look at the biltmore estate and wonder just how small George Vanderbilt's penis was...
Was just explained ingredients in a four loko. Puzzles of the universe starting to piece together.
My lips are sealed. Both pairs.
omg i met someone at the bar who sells hair feathers. that are long. saved in my phone as "haiirs deather"
Shot gunning beers for breakfast. You better be ready for today.
Close. The correct answer is shitting in a public toilet. We also would have accepted the pit of despair.
apparently i walked around all last night forcing people to beer bong whatever drink was in their hand. so far this morning ive had three people refer to me as beer bong man
When the nurse referred to my vag as "your downstairs", I knew I found the perfect Doctors office.
Realistically you can't tell me you're gonna put mashed potatoes on your dick and expect me not to get excited
i'm just really offended he didn't want to have breakup sex. like that was the only thing i was really looking forward to
Never let me go online shopping while drunk. I now own 2 baby cribs. I have no children
I bet your mom's never met a girl who's thrown up at the presidential inauguration before though.
Never thought I’d use my computer science degree for teledildonics, but here I am
Randomize
