break up sex still means we will always be broken up.
Why did we buy the only spinning apartment on campus?
Remember how we wr so drunk last nite we cldnt find whr i shot my load? ...found some of it.
he was walking around the bar drinking wild turkey and gobbling simultaneously
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I still think it's messed up that you're naming your kids after all the guys you slept with in college
Tidal wave of highness just hit. Find shelter and catnip. gloves. zebra striped car washes.
Ryan learned the all important lesson tonight; Red Bull gives you wings, Jaeger gives you gravity.
We're at the urgent care down the street from you if you care to stop by
I wish they could condense everything I needed, nutritionally speaking, into mike and ikes
Bro what are you doing Thursday the day before I go to jail??
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Her boobs felt like beanie babies from heaven
I just remember her dragging me inside in a panic saying we needed mentos and popcorn I have no fucking clue how we ended up asleep in her closet.
Kings cup with teenagers tonight
Done deal
A guy who takes a plate of chicken tenders away from us is not to be trusted or slept with
ARE YOU DEAD? TEXT Y FOR YES OR N FOR NO.
There is way too much butt cleavage here for a formal event.
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