Yes give me all the cream and he's gone
When I went to court, my judge's name was Honorable Ball. I couldn't stop laughing.
that probably didn't help your case.
Just bought a german beer stein with tuition cash. no regrets
oh good. ive just found out that i went downstairs at 6 am still blacked out and had a 30 minute conversation with my mom about the different ways to feed our dog
He came up there while i was bartending, ate a salad, told me he wanted to divorce me, then tipped me 10 dollars....
i just ran into my boss at the liquor store. we didnt exchange words, just nodded in mutual understanding.
Nope, just sitting on the couch, eating an advent calendar, being depressed about the herps.
The meeting is at the same hotel we go to for sex. Avoiding eye contact with all the staff there.
I think I've reached that age where I should start dating "congrats" and not "are you keeping it?"
I don't even know if I LIKE sober sex any more.
We can just keep having sex until one of us finds someone we actually like
Someone please drive out to my house to bring me a beer.. There are some in the fridge but I just can't get up
We're not piercing ourselves today.
I'm by the tree and the Dora the explorer balloon .. Look for the Dora the explorer balloon
I got outsmarted by a door tonight. Twice.
Randomize
