got some bad news about ur virginity. she didnt make it thru the night
i really did not know you could catch crabs from a sofa until now
I still have your handprint on my ass. You're not allowed to ignore me yet.
No, but its not like diarrhea. i swear its like my intestines had a secret bank account and i just punched in the right pin.
She told me she loves her boyfreind while she was giving me head. He must be a nice guy
Please take a moment of silence for the fact that I still have all 10 fingers
They actually said and I quote "it definitely looks like your knees went through some over usage"
MY TWIN SISTER IS ENGAGED. I REPEAT, MY SCREW UP OF A SISTER IS ENGAGED. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
I'll be there in 20 with vodka.
WHY WONT HOT GETMAN MAKR PUPR WITH ME!!!!???!?!!
Just convinced a housekeeper at work to set up her 401k. Gotta start hittin the gb every morning before work. Happy 420
hey at least you are getting hit on, i spent all day researching cat sedatives
you put your keys in the fridge so you wouldn't forget your yoohoo
Do it!! We better have a duck by the time I get home.
so he'll eat food out of a dumpster but he won't lick your ass?
Do you ever just want to be mashed potatoes?
Randomize
