i was shrooming and she was sobbing. i was trying to be sympathetic, but i could see the veins working like worms under her skin. and then her face stripped down to the muscle.
what was she crying about?
i wanna say it was the lack of skin on her face but maybe she lost her job.
I just woke up to crumpled tissues everywhere. Looks like it was another night filled with tears and semen.
And then she said we stopped for a train and i tried crawling out the back window.. again, i dont remember this.
i am breaking up with you. because you wash your hair too much and you only drink light beer and because you're not party enough.
can we change the rule from "no one is ugly after 2 am" to 1130 so i can justify last night
he called me from germany to tell me about all the gummy bears he bought...i'm doubting his sobriety
he suggested we do it doggy style cuz it was his dead dogs birthday...i had to do it
She's using our floating beer pong table as an air mattress to sleep on.
Told him I'd blow him in the bathroom. There was a giant window everyone was looking thru. He whipped it out n I burst out laughing n walked away. Even blackout drunk I set the bar high. You should be proud.
I feel like i'm walking on a never-ending field of baby sheep.
Sorry about flashing you in front of your mom.
I can't wait til me and pit bull can just be together
you don't go into accounting for the pussy....
My lease is up and I've been thinking, it's only fair that the guys I've fucked in this apartment in the past year help me move. They enjoyed the bed, now help me move it.
handcuff keys just fell out of my bra....wtf happened last night?
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