dude that girl has seen more cock ends then weekends
I shall celebrate this moment with a beer conveniently located in the sock drawer directly to the right of me.
Im sure that doesnt mean its ruined... It was your bithday you get a free "im drunk at 7 am" card
new level of vanity: sex dreams about deep throating myself...
apparently, i ordered a pogo stick last night. i can't even be mad about that.
she passed on me to fuck the foreign guy. is there a manlier, slightly less gay way of saying "always the bridesmaid, never the bride"?
nope.
my brother came home with a bottle of vodka and his pants off. were gonna spend more quality time together.
She's legit crying about wanting more sex. Holy shit.
im wtih 32a right now bc 34d is on her period. now i know how girls feel when their hookups go from magnums to regulars
I'm being an old woman and getting trashed in a night gown in public...of course it's going to be fun
He's currently surrounded by roughly 23 girls he fucked and never called. He may not make it out of here. Bar of doom? Or of redemption?
I just saw a herd of slutty loofahs run down the street...
Is it bad if I just put band-aids over my nipples? Way too hungover be dealing with a bra
wrestling a boy for fruit? sounds suspiciously like foreplay...
I mean, I Just Had Sex in 4 on her top 25 most played list. That's got to give you some indication
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