Hey man sorry I got all grabby
It's a sad day when you have to slightly move your fupa to shave.
I think I just sold my virginity for plane tickets
my nipple ring is gone but someone was nice enough to replace it with a paperclip
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I Know I'm the drunk girl in the trunk right now, BUT PLEASE LISTEN TO ME!
I bruised my vagina when I was climbing out of the trash can.
If he shows up in a "mount n dew" me shirt im throwing him to the lesbians
I'm sorry I did drugs then got really loud and bitchy at your party and judged your choice in one night stands.
Whatever, consider condoms an eighteen year investment.
I could probably save all of the money I would have spent on condoms and put a kid through college.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That bottle of wine took a part of my soul with it.
Martha Stewart has had a one night stand and is unsure if she's had a threesome. I no longer feel slutty.
doing squats while I brush my teeth.. gotta keep the booty in check
She asked me to come on her OkCupid date with her
Can't tell if it's the drugs or science magic, but I *THINK* that mouse just turned into a squirrel.
if jesus wore shoes made out of pure flavor and hurricane kicked u in the face thats how it feels to eat pizza bites right now
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