some dude just recognized me causeg he had a pic of us making out onvhis phone
fuck, i think i'm broken. Alchyhol air mattress = the suck.
Im so sleepy and hes snoring super loud! i just wanna suffocate him, sleep, and deal with the body when I wake up
He just turned on a sound machine. I need to get the fuck out of here.
We were playing flip cup on the nice dining room table. Losing team had to shamwow the table in between rounds
I just want you to know that if I ever had to fight man eating flowers or flying turtles to save my friends they'd be fucked. No one's worth all that bullshit. PS I really need to stop playing Wii while drunk.
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
Wow that was a lesbian tornado.
you trust me enough to eiffel tower a girl but don't trust me with a mallet wtf happened to our friendsship
So, were they human bite marks at least?
Your guess is as good as mine.
Remember when I got punched in the face on NYE last year? I don't
of fours songebofy did dknt stop believing
how legible are my texts
I just came rly close to telling a dude that I want to chew on him and there should be an oil painting of his ass up in the louvre before I realized that isn't how flirting is supposed to go
I just want to smoke weed and be the little spoon all winter. My modern day hibernation.
can we not speak foreign languages when I'm on drugs
Randomize
