I just remember standing in the shower with you eating chips.
Shes been standing with her arms crossed in front of the mirror for 45 minutes...she told me she's "getting sober"
This reunion sucks. All the confident hot girls from high school are still confident and hot, and none of the fat girls with low self esteem transformed into hot girls with low self esteem.
I drove your lawn mower home. Hope you don't need it tonight. I'll bring it over tomorrow.
and I keep making him eat me out and buying me presents, this is paradise. I wish he cheated on me earlier.
i vomited out of my nose in three different houses so far, i will be back for my boots tomorrow
Honestly I will go to church for him, I will even try to quit smoking for him. But his dick is not worth losing alcohol. He sure as fuck isn't taking away our wine nights.
Thank god crabs can't live on your head. Thank god.
Ummm so I'm at the hospital and just heard some guy get tazed......twice.
I opened the door and his girlfriend was standing there; we made silent, prolonged eye contact as I quietly put on my panties and left.
my mom snuck into my room, washed her clothes and made her breakfast. what the fuck she's a better boyfriend than I am
My ex husband is now my side piece. #thisis30
As your friend, who loves and cares for you, I have to be honest. I am judging you so VERY hard right now. Sorry.
Anyone who does not consider cereal and wine as a balanced breakfast needs to leave immediately.
We're meant to be. Apparently God wants me to get dicked down pretty good too so I'm not complaining about destiny
Randomize
