yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
So i just found out i replied to my room mates craigslist ad. Akward
we should become lesbians. not together. just in general.
Just woke up. My philosophy paper is a play, and my paper for musical theater is about physics. That's some dank shit you sold me
The fact that I woke up with my panties on the counter and a piece of pizza stuck in my sheets is what scares me.
i caught myself talking to a pigeon about my yeast infection.
It's 1 AM and there's a guy outside my house belting out Bennie and The Jets. He stops in between verses to puke. I'm joining him.
It's really sad that I'm trying to calculate in my head the type of place to have dinner that's worth anal
Apparently from about 3-5AM I was consoling that crying stripper about her life choices.
Getting drunk and falling down, isnt the best way to describe your hobbies, to your new co-workers.
It's snowing in May and there was a law school party at the strip club. The end is near.
I don't know anybody that can get the cops to drive them back to the bar after being pulled out of a tree
it happenes
I woke up hugging a box of cheerios that had "wonder woman" written in sharpie on it. So much for a sober night.
I talked to the pizza guy for 10 minutes about my truck, I don't even have a truck
i wasnt sure i had a crush on her until i woke up this morning and saw i had googled fifteen variations of "lesbian marriage in estonia". where the fuck is estonia
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