Be sure to let me know if your relationship crumbles so I can resume hitting on you
Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
I just saw a girl walk by me wearing a "kiss me I'm pro choice" shirt. Is that a signal for easy access?
I don't think I have ever puked up that much free breakfast in my life...thank god for Nickle Beers.
Hold my feet while i lean out of the window of the truck.
No dude trust me, just go a strip club at their busiest hours and pick the ugliest chick. Guaranteed she blows you for under 20$, the record stands at $7.67 and a pen from Bank of America,
Took me 12 hours to be sober again. Shitshow mission accomplished
Not sorry that my walk of shame this morning was barefoot on my scooter.
Right. Will do. I'll call you if I need a ride. (that is a double meaning, go with it.)
He skipped an important family function with his dying father to fuck me. Terrible human, amazing fuck buddy.
There's a cute bearded guy at this brew fest wearing a kilt and selling mead
TELL HIM ABOUT MY DOWRY!!!
I got a snap of someone jumping off a light pole. Was that you? Please confirm or deny. #onWisconsin
Went to my bottom drawer for my stash , gone just a note says thanks sucker love dad
She totals her lexus and all she wants is to have crazy wild sex.
you tried to fight the cop who was busting the party, you said you had a constitutional right to do a keg stand...
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