He keeps the condoms in his bible. I guess stairs or elevator, we're getting to hell one way or another.
nothing like walking down the street with a garbage bag of puke trying to find a dumpster
Dude before you bang that chick preheat the oven to 425 I wanna make a pizza for afties
dude, i turned on the light and asked if they were ok and they STILL didn't stop. Most determined sex EVER.
Maybe you shouldn't go to cosmic bowling, i don't know if cum glows and I don't wanna find out i'm sure his parents don't either.
We couldve played the bring a random boy to lunch game but i made him go home
I want to get back to junior year skinny- without all the drugs.
my vagina is like this close to growling at me and leading me onto the nearest dance floor
make it buy you a drink first
Discovery: there is a folder in my pictures labeled "Your Name and cats"
It was one of those mornings when I wake up and feel like I have to say sorry to the whole world
He told me I'm a small core of pure evil wrapped up in sweetness, gold, and puppies. He gets me.
That is beautiful
This hangover is what we deserve after that level of debauchery.
The guy whose house were at is drunkenly reading green eggs and ham to us in German
Do I masturbate or eat a pound of matazah. Alissa help what do I do??
She's got a shotglass necklace, running down the street asking people to "fill her up". Get here.
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