I just spent an hour correcting all the grammar and spelling of all the 2pac songs on my ipod
does drinking everclear count as brushing your teeth? because i think they are sterilized
Just saw a denim jacket with the phrase christian cowboy...ridin with the lord under a picture of a cowboy in a sunset. I'm def in mississippi.
I think the boy in my gender studies class cried when 90% of the girls said they had faked an orgasm
He was drinking a long island through his Breathalyzer tube.
Who wants vodka and apple sauce
That bottle of wine took a part of my soul with it.
Think of something healthy and responsible. Now think of the exact opposite, let's do the latter
I just did a jell-o shot with my grandmother. I can die now..
I'm not sure what exactly you were planning, but you kept yelling that we were going to need a lot of midgets and a lawyer.
i woke up at 4 pm face down on my hardwood living room floor. i would say its a new low but i think I found my new napping spot
Can't believe we're making vacation plans with the guy we had a threesome with
You can't leave me alone in times of distress because I will fuck things 🙈😐
Thought the acid was fake. Then my reflection didn't move when I did in the bathroom.
Just slather his penis with BBQ sauce
Randomize
