There's some strange man with hair that keeps talking to us. I'm scared.
This is how horror movies start. Going to bar with strange hair guy. He's paying. Bad idea?
Ditched hair man. Got free cab ride to market. Want food. I win.
He just seriously used the word "skeet." Can we please find another way to get weed?
No. Take one for the team.
I just made my bed perfectly before realizing that I'll be too drunk to appreciate it tonight
He wanted a handjob during a John Wayne movie. I just couldn't find it in my heart to disrespect that man. John Wayne that is.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We're going to play a drinking game. It's called "Senior Year of College."
Thanks for putting the blue stuff in the toilet, it made me throwing up this morning more enjoyable.
I want an alcoholic time machine so we could skip to new years eve
three guys with a tattoo of the Walmart rollback smiley holding up a middle finger on their ass=free drinks in every bar
I wasn't going to just ask my parents for a damn vibrator for christmas
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just keep your throat open and beer will always find its way in.
I’m not closing myself off the to the possibility of making a bad life choice.
Why do I know about what dicks have been in your mouth but didn't know you had a dog? What kind of friends are we??
Pooled our money and rented a bouncy castle for the day. Get over here now. Bring vodka.
I never thought I'd end up with a prison pen pal through tinder
In honor of Randy Savage we're wearing spandex and handing out slim jim's with option to suplex. Get behind it
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