And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
All my problems are solved. I just got McDonalds and scratch off lottery tickets.
Some kid in my class just puked in his backpack, zipped up the backpack, put the backpack on and walked out the door.
and then you yelled "out of the way, i'm a lifeguard!" and everyone let us through
YOU GOT KICKED OUT OF FIVE GUYS LAST NIGHT FOR THROWING PEANUTS AT THE PEOPLE WHO WORK THERE?!
correction: escorted out
Yea, remember to blow out the fire from flaming shots. Unless you want burnt lips. Just saying, I'm an example of ignorance and intoxication.
Also I think he would slowly, painfully, die. You really can't live without a penis. You'd explode.
I said to him "i can't have sex with anyone in my friend's living room" then he said "we can move the air mattress into the kitchen"
I want to go to a gay rodeo for my cross country road trip. It'll be like my very own homo country boy pilgrimage to the holy land.
I just shaved my "bikini area" into a fucking pizza slice
I was going to learn how to knit but I got high instead.
So you've been sexting me while spending time with your family
I'm a family man but I have priorities
Let's be honest, I've seen a decent amount of dicks in my life and very few of them have been worth all the trouble.
he took my bra off with his teeth, THEN decided he just wanted to make out and cuddle. i don't know what the female version of blue balls is, but i've been living with it since 1 a.m.
I told him he had to put his dick inside of me at approx 1159 to ensure it was birthday sex. i was 19 when he entered me.. came out 20. winning.
Randomize
