having sex with you is like teaching a dog to tango, it DOESN'T work
i just threw up in a potted plant at home depot
I didnt shave my beard last night, so I could feel it while Im shrooming today
I only put bad things in my body...jack, caffeine, chocolate, pills, and rich's cock. It's like being holistic but exactly opposite
I'm going to call you, don't answer. Need to practice moaning to your answering machine again
ur mom makes the best bacon
WHAT ARE YOU DOING IN MY HOUSE
wait no I wore my bra home that morning. I stole someone's bra last night?
Why do I have a bunch of cash....and your bra.
Nothing like snapchatring dick pics to a\nMarried woman while your girlfriend destroys Taco Bell in the next room. Almost caught, worth it. Got boobs back
Well I met my booty call's parents by accident, so that happened.
You know your acid trip is going well when the orange you're eating gives you a life lesson
Actually here it's more "lie around naked in a dark room" weather.
Also barcrawl friday. You ARE wearing a tiara
he's really high and upset. he just found out alice from the brady bunch died
rowboat hit a rock. taking on water. going down fast. bring cheerios.
aye aye capn
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