My 3rd grade teacher, who was also my fav, thought i was in prison. That seriously upsets me.
Spaghetti and Car Bombs, good idea or what will end up on the bar in a few minutes?
doing washington apple shots with my mom. sunday afternoons suddenly got so much better.
I was just handed jelly beans by a guy in a penguin costume. Standby for confirmation on if they are actually drugs.
Can we promise no matter what that we have sex the night the Mayan calendar runs out?
You kept trying to throw the grocery cart off the balcony.
The shit show didn't end. it just relocated itself to my apartment instead of yours.
you also need to get my treadmill fixed.
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
I think he just tried to put your boyfriend in a trashcan....
I hate how she's getting mean with age
Meh, you can't hate. That's our basic life goal and you know it.
I AM A SEXUAL NIGHTMARE
I barfed on the cat last night. Just wanted to share.
I would definitely ride that dick into the sunset if nuggets are involved
we are the best best friends ever. You had sex in an ice cream truck I had sex in a fire truck
You're swimming in an imaginary pool of pudding. What do you think?
Randomize
