At Coney Island the sign for the rollercoaster The Cyclone says, "Make sure your glasses and weave are secure."
It was the first time I had seen his penis when it wasnt hard. It just looked so vulnerable and a little bit depressed.
I wore my underwear in the shower just in case i passed out and you had to come in and get me
I have been running off of weed, alcohol, and Mexican food. What is Tallahassee.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he just made me youtube cheetahs running and he thinks he is in a pool
Hypothetical question: how bad would bacardi be as an IV drip?
death...100% death...what r u planning.
on a scale of 1 to 'no sex' how busy are you this week?
hey dude, just got with the girl in H4. so mark H off the apartment list
haha we are half through our lease and already checked off 17 letters
I had a dream about a vibrator with 42 different settings. If that's not a good indication I need to get laid, I don't know what is
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Was it just me or did you also find it awkward when "glad you came" started playing on pandora right after you finished?
I was walking around the party holding a dog on my shoulder like it was a parrot
Suspicion confirmed. my mom has her nipples pierced
Way to crack the case Nancy Drew
No like you've drunkenly persistently tried to take your shirt off in the middle of a park filled with children. You had already thrown your bra at my crotch.
You dropped my mother on the dance floor. She has a concussion. You didn't apologize. Don't speak to me for a while.
I've reached the last of the wine in my cup so now I have to sit up in my bed to get it through the crazy straw
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