He muttered something about having just washed he sheets, then demanded I give him all my quarters.
oh there is nothing like the 1st beerbong of the school year
She said she couldnt do it today but shed make it up to me next week
stick it in her butt and if she asks, say that thats what you thought she meant
I'm getting very good at recycling my hook ups. So even though i'm having more sex... I'm the same amount of slutty.
Yes! I like to call that picking from the buffet!
you just used a box of cheese-its to get into the bar
if I want to go home with a foreign boy, please feel free to let me go, sober me gives you permission to let drunken me do it
I'm watching i used to be fat. I've been doing crunches for the last half hour yelling at the slut on tv to stop crying and do crunches.
Thanks for stopping me from letting that 14 year old feel my boobs. Thanks.
I just want to jump into a ballpool of dicks now.
Just had to hide the fact that I'm not wearing underwear from my 7 year old niece.
It's not that he's ugly its just that being blind folded makes everything less awkward
Yess he was literally so drunk that like at one point I'm pretty sure he thought it was hard and in when neither were true :/ haha
Did he hurt you? I have a crowbar I can beat his sorry ass with
For future reference: When the bouncer is approaching you to remove you from his bar, you don't respond by taking off your pants.
Last night I realized my life is an experiment of really bad decisions when I had to leave without my underwear. But at least I'm expanding my life experience.
Randomize
