i killed an earwig and left its corpse on the wall as a warning
Should I tell Kevin that my finger was in his sister's ass last night?
you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
Ever have a poop and think... that has no business coming out of a human? Like it looks like a sick dog's or a ferral animal's?
Just took a celebratory "i havent slept with anyone in this bar" shot. yesssss....
Stop trying to get a gf and raw dog some forest beasts like sasquatch
Bad Decision October is in full swing. I was telling people that "I put on eye makeup today, I'm takin' a dude home with me!".
We need to do something soon. I need like 4,000 beers and a cigarette.
I screamed so bad because I thought he was going for my sandwich forgetting it was in my hand
I came so hard I burst a blood vessel in my eye. If i cant marry this girl, I'm gonna have to switch teams.
he has to serve us drink and appetizers in his french maid costume for the Pirates game tonight. Bring everyone.
At least he finally released me from his spooning oven of death...
Guess who just hooked up with a guy who was wearing a shirt from his mom's "dress up closet"?!
I would rather suck a dick or two than go there
I'm committing myself to dance. Also, I'm unsure if you said space party sounded lame because dude was old, but I hope you're over it because I love space, and I love David Bowie and I love to dance, and you need to embrace this with me.
Randomize
