is your mom at the bar?
He is such a slut. More and more my type.
Interestingly im still mad at you for the time we got high and you tried to hump me.
Lol thats a classic
I was fucking the girl and her best friend walked in on us. She said we looked thirsty, got us a glass of water, and poured it down both of our throats. It was like... sex bottle service
Being drunk at the hospital is better than i expected. I got to hide and play in the little kids waiting area. Btw no one is hurt
After she lost the bet I made her get on one knee so she could "Te-blow me"
Im sorry that my initial plan of you grabbing his dick didnt work out but Im glad you grabbed his heart
Dear female. Happy valentines day. If you have not had the pleasure of making love to me, please do not fret, I will get around to it soon enough. If you indeed have made love to me, then bravo, wasn't that grand! Perhaps we should do it again? Regardless, have a good day. This has been a public service announcement. Rock on.
I invented the best game. It's called "what touched my exposed nutsack?" It can range from pillows to toothbrushes
Thanks to you and Ketel One I now have a court summons with the actual word "frolicking" on it.
No I just rolled on the floor giggling. I think that's the equivalent to a post sex victory dance.
The beer shits the day after completing the World Beer Tour at Epcot are just as epic as the tour itself.
I'm turning into an adult here.
Adults touch each other's special zones.
PLEASE HELP ME THE AMERICANS ARE YELLING ABOUT TURKEY, I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO
I hope the lord has blessed you with many tampons, child.
Randomize
