Drunk x Brooklyn = problems getting home. If I don't make it you can have my computer and my bitches. You're welcome.
I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
I may have a concussion but the symptoms are the same as a hangover so I can't tell. Best 21st ever.
You don't understand how difficult it is to give head with cotton mouth
thanks for at least making it out of the pool before you threw up
You were drunk it couldn't have been that bad
I've never been drunk enough to enjoy getting a blister on my dick.
Just had sex to Jesse & the Rippers. Can check that one off the bucket list.
You threw a handful of caps into a pitcher of Heineken and asked everyone if they wanted to go "bobbing for molly"
So we decided we're going to stop having sex...except for tonight. And probably tomorrow.
I can now say I know getting hit in the face with a flying tortilla is not fun
The guy I hooked up with last night left me alone with his dog AND IT JUST SHIT ON THE FLOOR. WHAT DO I DO
i'm high and self actualising, please send help
I just want to sit in my tub, drugged out of my mind, and watch the green lantern cartoon while the world as we know it ceases to exist outside my bathroom door, Okay? Is that REALLY too much to ask?
He's perfect in every other way. Is buying him a cockring too forward or just honest?
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