im doing shots everytime lil jon says it in the song shots....blackout town here i come
do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
wicked high...have munchies. cherry flavor lube. problem solved.
After 10 years all I have gotten is one bra pic, at this point I should be able to draw your cervix from memory
Yeah sketchy neighborhood.. Some woman ran by screaming, "i didn't steal anything" as some cops rolled up and arrested her.
Im beginning to think that if I ever write an autobiography it will have to be mostly fill in the blank.
My last google search was "mavis beacon techs tping" Thank god google auto corrects bc otherwise i wouldn't know that i drunk-type 13 words a minute.
THAT DOESN'T MEAN YOU SHOULD LET ME CHUG VODKA.
is it cool if i crash at ur house this weekend again bro
yea dude but i wld bring a sleeping bag or something just in case. or u may just have to shack up with a woman or 2 cuz we hav 10 girls visiting/staying over at my house.
how did u manage to make sleeping with a bunch of girls sound like an inconvenience?
So his roommate walked in on us, went upstairs to tell her bf she has found a new use for the rafters & they must try it.
Your mission, should you decide to accept it, is to pick up rum, beer, and cigarettes. Your holiday will self-destruct if you ignore this message.
I just got fingered in the Win-Co parking lot for pills. How's your meltdown going?
im not letting a little injury get in the way of my alcoholic/drug problems. we ARE getting turnt tonight.
The cop looked me right in the eye and apologized for cock blocking me.
Know we haven't talked but having an orgy party on the 20th if you're interested. If not, disregard this text.
Who is this?
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