I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
We hit a deer, sort of a buzz kill. But it's fine.
Todays outfit involves shorts with embroidered fish. This kids gonna die.
i dont know you, but i just did a line with your business card.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Rooting for you and your team in the Beer Olympics this afternoon...! Love you, Mom
It's the eternal vodka... it never seems to go away
i have at this current moment imbibed enough alcohol to float immerse or otherwise submerge a goat of respectable size. tequila
I AM THERE IN SPIRIT, TICKLING YOUR BALLS
I miss you too. And it was nice meeting your brother while I was mounting you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like I just want to take a shot of jack, have sex, and shoot myself in the face. In that order exactly.
Sorry for face planting onto the table with all our alcohol on it
I'll pretend I don't know she's blind, my morals claimed the back seat in this adventure.
Details are irrelevant. Come bail me out of jail.
5 seconds ago I had no idea that a fart could travel so fastly thru the tanning bed. I taste it in the back of my neck.
Once you find out someone has a small dick, you never look at them the same again.
Randomize