You took my girl thats shot the Fuck out. You better watch your skinny ass.
That's barely a sentence. Who's your girl? I think you've got the wrong number. I haven't even lived in Alabama for 4 years.
Yeah, I do, I'm sorry. I meant 205 not 256. sorry about that.
Good luck with your revenge in Birmingham.
Every one of her profile pictures looks like an ad for American Apparel. Of course she has syphilis.
he just tried to convince me that tylenol is a gateway drug
Yeah but the gay hasidics turned out to actually just be real gay hasidics
we just plugged the camera up to the big screen. would you like to come see what you did last night, in high definition?
I like yr title more along "the hot Russian I have sex with."
Well I knew we were drunk when I told you it was a good idea to shit in the ocean
almost got into it with the cashier. bitch dont look at me like that just cuz im only buying wine and icing. ill fight.
I'm on my fifth cocktail in twenty minutes. I don't think I will end this on two legs.
the number of desperate girls at the gym right now is unfair. it would be cruel not to let one blow me.
Bring scissors.....i think im gonna have to be cut out of this damn jockstrap
he says he is going to get you very high and make you leave the country with him
possibly by boat
I just bought a 1/4 oz of pot from a coworker who's old enough to be my grandfather...I'm never leaving Portland.
But if you move out who will get drunk with me on the roof and yell at boys?!?
You chipped your front tooth on the toilet bowl. Should I call your dentist?
Randomize
