do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
That poor girl was naked and had to be at a job interview in an hour
I boned her and wore a Freddy mask once. It was pretty lol
I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
God gave me these boobs for a reason other than for people to throw things down them.
careful of the bathroom.... theres some drunken ninja turtles in there....
I have pictures of you taking tequila shots off the front of the police car when the cop wasn't looking.
Im going to hell in a hand basket. With a ribbon tied to my head. I'll be like a puppy for the devil.
Is everyone touching their nose at me a sign that I should stop snorting vicodin off my phone in the bathroom at school?
I'd rather be sodomized with a fullly decorated Christmas tree.
Just peed out a window, not entirely sure it's open. Can't tell. I'll find out in the morning.
So maybe I got drunk and hooked up with him in a hot tub? I mean that's nothing to be ashamed of, that kind of takes talent. I'd drown.
No you don't understand. This tree is really alive. Like in Pocahontas.
Who wants to play the "pick up your shit from our floor because you're not paying rent or dating either of us" game?
At 3:00am my whole house started smelling like cooking meat. I have no idea why she thought it was a good idea to crock-pot a WHOLE turkey that early in the morning.
Randomize
