Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
Btw the nut in my hair goes great with my outfit !!! :(
barbara walters just said penis...
Life lesson: Don't give a drunk girl a dutch oven after having taco bell. She puked all over my pillow. Funny as hell though.
you stole their roomba and ran out the door so that you could 'set it free'.
we found you passed out on lawn and the roomba bouncing back and forth on the sidewalk.
he must have thought the song was "ejacuate on the dance floor"
He could list all of the presidents! Every one, and in order!! I was so impressed the least I could do was give him a blow job.
Ah, yes. Making our founding fathers proud.
we cut her off and put her in bed but by the time we got back to the drinks she was already there shirtless. she's the topless tequila ninja
He said female orgasms are a myth and refuses to even try to give me one.
He said I could pay him back in blow jobs. What's the going rate for those these days?
We need to do something soon. I need like 4,000 beers and a cigarette.
He even wore it to bed. What the hell. He's too excited about that goddamn costume.
Easter bunny might get some gnarly munches and not even have enought candy left to hand out
We ended up shitfaced at the house after the Super Bowl trying to get someone from Scientology on the phone.
Can I get high for this class every tuesday? Its like a multi-sensory carnival acid trip.
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