Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
When she said "surprise me" I'm positive she didn't mean "bang my roommate"
Prob not but she was surprised
i hate when i ask a girl what she's being for halloween and the first word isn't "slutty"
Her underwear doesnt even match. If youre going to be a face book whore at least have matching shit.
New drinking game: take a shot everytime Jay-Z is played during the NFL draft.
Come over, I want to eat cookie dough off your dick.
Someday you'll be stoned enough to create a one-person step team and then you'll understand
Also I legit had a girl at my bar crying tonight saying to her friend "why did he have to take his top off ?"
Blasting venetian snares and drinking a beer. I love being an adult. It's like being a child but with beer for breakfast, better music, and no one yells at you.
Sneezing cum all over the table was not the highlight of the family reunion if that tells you anything
And the view of you in reverse cowgirl is arguably the most spectacular view ever... And I've seen the Eiffle tower, the colosseum, mountains of Hawaii, Michaelangelo's David, and the Mona Goddamn Lisa. Just saying.
All im saying is that my face might fall off.
Well we found Mark's missing underwear. They're pinned up on Mike's trophy wall.
I cannot take an uber back in my costume...can you please come get me?
Bleach your asshole, I'm on my way.
Who is this?!?!
Randomize
