I just did your MASH and your life is pretty unfortunate. Youre marrying the tech guy for love. you live in a shack and you're a hooker and you make $1 a day. you drive a brown limo and you have 7 kids
i now know how you feel when you have to walk me home. she ran into a streetlight and into garbage.
Why am I getting the stink eye from these people? They're acting like BYOB isn't kosher in a laundromat.
I'm thinking about that time I was in a trashbag and you spray painted my hair yellow
is it too much to get a jumbo margarita in a sippy cup right now?
I'm going to need your assistance. I cannot walk back to the house in a bear costume.
Those tiny little fruit fly looking mofos. They fly past the phone and I grabbed them like Daniel-San
Dressing as mugato from zoolander Halloween you may want to be the hand model. We can get you a fish bowl filled with Clementine Vodka and soda you can put your hand in.
Did you feel uncomfortable?
For a little while. Then I got really high and ate a bunch of animal crackers out of some dudes pocket while we chilled on their super comfortable couch.
One day i'll wow you with artfully trimmed pubes.
I AM GONNA CUM EVERYWHERE TONIGHT BRO.
I found a hair colour I want in a porn.
First non virgin Sunday. Bursts into flames.
Just do what I do and listen to your vagina. She’ll growl when she smells good dick
We ran out of vodka, so instead of body shots you wanted to do cupcake shots off her naked body...happy birthday to you.
Randomize
