At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
He finally told me that he's married. I guess it doesn't really matter.
Capitaan dildo arrescate!
Had to use the product locator on on the four loko website to find them at home. Got to go in the backroom of a grocery store to get them. Dedication.
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The night took a downhill turn when he started using a butter knife as a spoon to drink his cosmo
Not till Sunday. I'm going to sleep in my car. And I know. This place is insane. Blood on the stAirs 5 dollar slices of pizza. A girl on our floor had a stroke.
Thursday nights need to stop happening to me.
My stomach is revolting cause i have put food in it and no alcohol.
Come part with me. By you sleep! No fun. Idek feelings Sorry for your life.
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If the egyptians can build pryamids men can walk on the moon and ron jeremy can sleep with all those bitches then we can finish these three handles of vodka
I woke up in a hospital at three in the morning only to realize my pee is now going to be orange. I've grown to realize I've made all the right decisions
Just an FYI if we break up I'm going to sleep with your cousin or who ever my dealer is.
its so awesome dude, its like im a magical unicorn or something
Best part though was when he wanted to cuddle and I was like, I'm going to go.
Just woke up beside some twink in a kilt.. how is your sunday going
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