the guy I was hooking up with asked me if he could wear a guerilla suit during sex.
Brogan sounds similar to Bridget...sorta.
Every girl's name is automatically translated to "Baby/Milk Carrier" in my brai
Do they make some cleansing product for your soul? Like mouthwash that makes you not a skank? Or is that what religions for?
Eh, i think it's called sobriety. But its not fun.
One thing i hate about playoff baseball: George Lopez
She said she didn't want to have sex because she was so torn up about "this whole NBC thing."
the weed was in a baggy that had little penguins on it. i am so excited you have no idea
He told me his penis would be a "Sad Panda" if I didn't give it a ride through the jungle.
Oh we're fine. I made her a "sorry I peed on you" omelet.
TINY HANDS NOT FOR BUTTHOLES
This is going everywhere on the internet.
It's like a bag of dicks covered in taint sweat pounding a pregnant baby walrus.
classified somewhere between kinky and medically inadvisable
Like an undercooked grilled cheese that got cold again. But hairy.
And there goes my desire for sandwiches. Forever.
You could be a whistle.. And just ask bitches if they want to blow you all night
I just thought you should know that you should be proud of your dick. It's pretty much perfect. Just, ya know, by the way.
The salt made it so good this margarita is touching my soul. I swear I'm not high BUT I want elote in a cup with the insides of a shrimp taco. I think that would make my life complete.
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