And we started making out. She asked me to pick a number between 1 and 10. I said 6. She took me to her room. A few minutes later I wasnt a virgin. DUDE I WAS GOING TO SAY 2.
hey everyone... booty call? my house tonight. bring friends to fuck my friends.
Just caught my first cougar this fake was worth every fucking penny.
We need to get sombreros so I can give them to strippers.
Edward fifth and chaser hands
We found her on a strangers doorstep chanting "I know someone will let me in" it took 2 of us to drag her to the car.
I am just pathetic enough to be sitting on the couch with my cat drinking absinthe and vodka watching moulin rouge. Hello, tuesday night.
If he comes over tomorrow, im answering the door naked. Simple as that.
Should I take my grandma to a keg tomorrow or not? Serious question
Long story short I'm making an I'm sorry card for a girl I dont remember having sex with
Thanks for bringing me tea/a bucket. You have earned yourself a face touch.
We tried to do sophisticated last night, but our low class kept shining through.
Was the guy in the cowboy hat kinda hot or have I just not had sex in a really long time?
I don't know what's worse. The fact that my biological mother is an unwitting bigamist, or the fact that my half sister is trying to seduce my girlfriend.
My face is going numb. I think it's time I call it quits
Randomize
